By Kevin Brown | Bio
Recently, I came across an article from the New York Times entitled "Invisible Immigrants, Old and Left With ‘Nobody to Talk To’",
concerning elderly immigrants in the United States and the loneliness
and isolation that many of them experience, especially those who
speak little or no English.
The article references
Mr. Devendra Singh, a 79-year-old widower, who commented on differences
he observed in people in North America and people in India. “Here
people think about what is convenient and inconvenient for them.” He
notes that in India, there is a favorable bias towards the elderly. And
Professor Teas, a sociology professor and demographer at the University
of California, Irvine, also noted in the article that, "Reliant on
their children, late-life immigrants are a vulnerable population. They
come anticipating a great deal of family togetherness. But American
society isn’t organized in a way that responds to their cultural
expectations.”
I hold the view that loneliness, isolation,
and the desire for family togetherness is shared by an increasing
number of seniors right across North America. These experiences and desires are not unique to immigrants, although they may indeed be more pronounced.
During
the last few weeks, my brother-in-law, my wife and myself have been
visiting my mother-in-law in Edmonton, while she is recovering in
hospital from a fall and an unrelated infection. At this time, it looks
favorable that she will be able to return to her assisted living
complex. During our visits, each of us have noticed the infrequent
visits to other seniors in the same ward as my mother-in-law. In fact,
this experience reminds me of our visits to my mother while she was in
hospital six years ago. The periodic visits to her ward mates was just
as noticeable. How the seniors in my mother-in-law’s ward must long
for the experience of family togetherness that was present for their
parents and for their grandparents.
In discussions with my
mother and my mother-in-law (while they were in hospital), each had
plenty of time to share their experiences of family life while they
were growing up. The family was the centre of life. And the deep
closeness that typified their families was a source of pride. Now, of
course, family members are lucky if they live in the same city or
country. Mr. Singh's comment about people's concern for what is
convenient and inconvenient begs the question, “Do we make time for the seniors in our life?” If not, and if these relationships are important to us, we must find and create other ways to keep connected.
At the Eldering Institute®, we are committed to transforming the conversation about what is possible as we grow older. The first two commitments in the Eldering Manifesto
call us into a new possibility and vision for growing older and
relating to one another with respect and dignity. I invite you take a
few minutes to read it and add your name to the hundreds of people who
are committed to Eldering™. Let's work together to connect with seniors in the communities in which we live. © 2009 Kevin Brown. All rights reserved.
Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
Increasingly I find myself thinking about the word
retirement and whether it has the appeal that it once had for the mature
worker. I remember, as if it were yesterday, my father talking about how he was
looking forward to retirement. After working long hours and raising a family,
there just did not seem much time for anything else. Through much of his
mid-life, my dad's job (conductor for the railroad) had him working away from
home and on the road during the week. Weekends were mostly reserved for rest
before returning to the job the following Monday. Often he would share how he
looked forward to being able to spend time doing the things he really wanted to
do. I just assumed that meant golfing and fishing simply because those are
about the only leisure activities that I remember my dad enjoying. [ Read More]
Written by eldering at Retirement
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
In my previous post,
I mentioned two books that I was in the process of reading, Ken
Dychtwald's "With Purpose" and Don Tapscott's "Grown Up Digital".
Ken's book calls us to consider how we will spend our time and apply
our life experience in the later stages of our life. Don's book has us
consider the impact the 'Net Generation' is having on the world at
large. I have only begun to read "Grown up Digital" and already I am
reading it from the perspective of aging. While considering the impact
of the 'Net Generation', I am really listening for "What does this mean
to the generation of baby boomers (my generation) that is about to
retire and how will it directly or indirectly influence our
generation's impact on society going forward?"[ Read More]
Written by eldering at Retirement
Tagged with:
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
I was reading Ken Dychtwald’s With Purpose
recently, and was struck by a comment in the introduction. He noted
that "in a single generation, sixty-two went from 'such a long life' to
'he died so young'." Being 57 myself, I have a personal interest in
the subject of aging and how I can continue to live a life that is
significant and contributes to the communities in which I live, learn,
work, and play. Another book that is waiting to be read is Canadian author Don Tapscott’s Grown Up Digital.
[ Read More]
Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Tagged with:
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 By Kevin Brown | Bio
Earlier
in the spring, I wrote an article titled The Care and Feeding of
Seniors in which I stated "I view aging: as a natural progression of
life that embodies endless possibilities. This view is the core reason
why I joined the Eldering Institute, an organization that promotes a
life of power, purpose and possibility for Elders. I choose to live in
a world in which individuals, regardless of age, are committed to
continually creating new possibilities for their lives. I am speaking
of possibilities that allow individuals to share the very best of who
they are. In the world I envision, imagine the impact that Elders,
collaborating with other generations, will have on the communities in
which they live, learn, work and play!"[ Read More]
Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Tagged with:
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
It
is my experience that caregiving is fast becoming another role that
adults will take on in the communities in which we live. In fact,
Statistics Canada reports that seniors made up 13.1% of the general
population in 2005. The Ottawa-based Institute of Marriage and Family,
in their recently released report titled 'Care-Full', states that
between 2005 and 2056, the average Canadian's life expectancy will rise
by seven years. One could assume that the statistics for the United
States will be similar in nature. It seems to me, therefore,
that even if you have not assumed the role of a caregiver in the past,
it is a role that you will likely assume sometime in your future.[ Read More]
Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Tagged with:
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
In
my last post, I shared my observations concerning the ability of my
mother-in-law to embrace change. This week I thought I would focus on
the challenges faced by her primary caregiver, my wife. Rather than
address the challenges in the relationship between adults and their
aging parents, I will share some of the challenges caregivers (family
or friends) increasingly face from healthcare providers. Some of these
challenges may indeed be unique to our province and country of
residence (Alberta, Canada), but surely some will exist in your
community as well. One of the third-party challenges my wife
faces[ Read More]
Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action
Tagged with:
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
Many
of you are experiencing firsthand what it means to be living with
someone older than you. Perhaps you are a teen or young adult living
with your parents, or perhaps you are an adult who has a parent or
older relative living with you. Experience reveals that at some point
in our lives we will be sharing an intergenerational relationship while
under one roof. Most of us have the experience of living with our
parents while we grow up. But the experience of taking on a caring role
is very different.[ Read More]
Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Tagged with:
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
You
must forgive the title of this post, especially if you view aging the
way that I view aging: as a natural progression of life that embodies
endless possibilities. This view is the core reason why I joined the
Eldering Institute, an organization that promotes a life of power,
purpose and possibility for Elders. I choose to live in a world in
which individuals, regardless of age, are committed to continually
creating new possibilities for their lives. I am speaking of
possibilities that allow [ Read More]
Written by eldering at Fearless Aging
Tagged with:
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By Kevin Brown | Bio
Recently,
I had the privilege of meeting with a local group of leaders that were
actively engaged in Eldering activities in the heart of Calgary
Alberta, Canada. I was fortunate in that one of those leaders, my
Uncle George Hopkins (a gentleman who really espouses the Eldering Principles), shared with me the contribution a group of seniors are making within their community. George
is currently active with a group of elder leaders in his community
bringing together seniors and youth in community theatre events. He
and his group have been partnering with [ Read More]
Written by eldering at Wisdom in Action
Tagged with:
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